Writing on my lunch break as I always do,

30 Mar

but this time with more purpose, further realizing my purpose and what I’m to do in it.  These written meditations, they provide more musical growth and character development, more motioned Truth.  I’m seeing purpose as re-calculation and re-calibration.  You don’t just know your purpose, you learn it.  Hence, the exploration, the openness and the eventual understanding from it.  Writing on lunch I collect in an empty office, seeing more of what I’m to do…. If I want to make more money, I do this…. I want to be happier, I do this…. YOU, want to have a certain mode of living, you…. Purpose entails an interconnectedness of election and sight.  Over and over I think about this, my purpose, what I’m supposed to do at a certain time, and if what I’m doing is bringing me closer to purpose and truth or if it’s ushering me in the wrong direction, further away.

My momentum, these stages in this story, my story, further understanding my present present, my actualization of thought.  If I wanted, I could just walk out of here, leave the winery and the wine industry, and do something else.  But I don’t as I’m certain it further assembles my character, purposes my purpose.  You find yourself at an age, at whatever age, where you see your character more objectively, and evaluate your actions with more intention, a little more scrutiny and centeredness.  That’s where I am… these inward jots, helping me see, assisting in my roundedness of purpose, knowing my purpose, and acting from it.

Over twenty minutes left in my break, and I have no interest in eating.  I need to get somewhere, somewhere with my character, with my story, with my writing and eventual travels, with teaching and how I want to teach, if I’m even teaching.  One of my resolves, my bourns if you will, is to speak with students, everywhere.  To help them realize that their goals are more than attainable, that they are already there perceptively they just to build the bridge to the material, the tangible.  The student life and experience, mentality and movement has forever been my purpose, why I woke up this morning wanting to learn— more about myself and my career as an educator, about the world around me, my “students” in both classes, everything.  Being a student myself and connecting more to the student’s story and narrative, largely tells my purpose.

A student.  Me.  MY purpose.  Writing on lunch as only a student with an assignment due would do.  Today, I keep myself purposeful, a student, even when bored… and if I’m finding myself a bit idle, I’ll write why I feel that way.  Deconstruct and reconstruct it.  This break, nearly not happening as I was tempted to go get tacos down the road, or something, teaches.  I learn.  I’m in the learner’s lean, finishing my assignments, closer to graduation, closer to more of the purpose.  All parcels of your purpose, with work, will live with defined togetherness, no gaps, crucial realizations and loud understanding of Self.

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